WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?

Sometimes I don't know how I get through the day when I feel this way.

It seems I have this insatiable need, an unquenchable thirst that I don't think I'll ever satisfy.

At times it's almost hard to breathe...I want so badly that I think I'll go crazy if I don't get.....it.

When I started this blog I wanted to bear all my feelings...it's like therapy, right? It makes things better...get the frustrations and anger and sadness and fear out into the open.

But lately it seems all I can do is want...and sometimes it gets so bad I think about the neighbor down the street...good looking...seems friendly enough...he has a construction business...but what would he do if I went to him...asked him to help me with something...I want to do this here or change this there...and as he stood there in my house I make it known to him...I want...and I will do what he likes...if he'll just. take. this. body.

And he does.

I catch someone's eye at the store. He catches mine. He knows I'm needing...he sees it somehow...he can do what he wants. All I need is for him to take me.

And he does.

The cop I see once in a while...he's smiled at me...once he held a door for me as I went into the post office...nodded...said hi...what would he think of me...if he knew I imagined sitting astride his lap...fucking him? Would he have me meet him sometimes in a quiet place so he could have me again...so I could kneel before him and suck his cock?

I'm sorry...I can't help it. I want to be tasted and fucked and taken and made to get on my knees so that I can swallow a hard cock...I want hands all over me and lips on my skin...I want to be wanted as much in return.

I'm not a slut...I don't pick up men to fuck...but sometimes I wish I did.

This is almost painful, but I love it.